Quotes by Bill Hicks

“Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves.”

“If you dont think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CDs and burn them.”

“We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.”

“I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your fuckin mouth.”

“This is your brain. Ive seen a lot of weird shit on drugs. I have never ever ever ever EVER looked at a fucking egg and thought it was a brain.”

“No, I dont do drugs anymore, either. But Ill tell you something about drugs. I used to do drugs, but Ill tell you something honestly about drugs, honestly, and I know its not a very popular idea, you dont hear it very often anymore, but it is the truth: I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day.”

“I love talking about the Kennedy assasination. The reason I do is because Im fascinated by it. Im fascinated that our government could lie to us so blatantly, so obviously for so long, and we do absolutely nothing about it. I think thats interesting in what is ostensibly a democracy. Sarcasm - come on in. People say Bill, quit talking about Kennedy man. It was a long time ago, just let it go, alright? Its a long time ago, just forget it. Im like, alright, then dont bring up Jesus to me. As long as were talking shelf life here...”

“Dinosaur fossils? God put those there to test our faith. Thank God Im strapped in right now here man. I think God put you here to test my faith, Dude. You believe that? Uh huh. Does that trouble anyone here? The idea that God.. might be...fuckin with our heads? I have trouble sleeping with that knowledge. Some prankster God running around: Hu hu ho. We will see who believes in me now, ha HA.”

“We gotta come to some new ideas about life folks ok? Im not being blase about abortion, it might be a real issue, it might not, doesnt matter to me. What matters is that if you believe in the sanctity of life then you believe it for life of all ages. Thats what I hate about this child-worship syndrome going on. Save the children! Theyre killing children! How many children were at Waco? Theyre killing children! What does that mean? They reach a certain age and theyre off your fucking love-list? Fuck your children, if thats the way you think then fuck you too. You either love all people of all ages or you shut the fuck up.”

“You know all that money we spend on the military ever year -- trillions of dollars? Instead, if we use this money to feed and clothe the poor of this world, which it would do many times over, then we can explore space, inner and outer, together, as one race.”

“Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thoughts; thats their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm. . . . Sounds like . . . every commercial on television, doesnt it?”

“I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative. I dont like anything in the mainstream and they dont like me.”

“I can speak for every guy in this room here tonight. Guys, if you could blow yourselves, ladies, youd be in this room alone right now. Watching an empty stage.”

“They blow themselves up in order to get at us, and we launch 3 million dollar missiles off of giant floating iron islands 2000 miles away -- Who are the real cowards?”

“How about a positive LSD story? Wouldnt that be news-worthy, just the once? To base your decision on information rather than scare tactics and superstition and lies? I think it would be news-worthy.”

“Ill show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs. I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking. Hey, wait a minute, theres one guy holding out both puppets!”

“Im tired of this back-slapping Isnt humanity neat? bullshit. Were a virus with shoes, okay? Thats all we are.”

“The world is like a ride in an amusement park. And when you choose to go on it you think its real because thats how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down and round and round. It has thrills and chills and its very brightly coloured and its very loud and its fun, for a while. Some people have been on the ride for a long time and they begin to question: Is this real, or is this just a ride? And other people have remembered, and they come back to us, they say, Hey, dont worry, dont be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride. And we kill those people.”

“See we just had a misunderstanding. I thought we lived in the U.S. of A., the United States of America. But actually we live in the U.S. of A., the United States of Advertising. Freedom of expression is guaranteed? If youve got the money!”

“We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.”