Quotes by Susan C. Young

Think of the communication that takes place in your own life on a continuous basis—at home, at work, with friends, and beyond. When you actively listen to people, you enhance communication.

Listening actively confirms for people that you are positively receiving and thoroughly understanding the message they are conveying.

By your practice of active listening, everyone involved benefits because you . . .• are more engaged and engaging;• demonstrate that you are interested in others and what they have to say;• make others feel important, respected, understood, and appreciated; • improve your memory and retention;• affirm to others that you are an authentic, caring, and compassionate person;make a great first and last impression

If the skill of participatory listening came effortlessly and easy for everyone, there would not be so many misunderstandings, communication breakdowns, irritations, and frustrations.

Active listening is key to all healthy and effective communication, however, it doesnt necessarily come easily.

Through the years, I have heard that the average person speaks at about 150-160 words per minute, but can listen at a rate of about 1,000 words per minute. What is going on during all that extra mind time? • Our minds are racing ahead and preparing for the next thing we are going to say.• We are preoccupied with other thoughts, priorities, and distractions.• Our subconscious filters are thumbing through our database of memories, judgments, experiences, perspectives, and opinions to frame how we are going to interpret what we think someone is saying.

While active listening is crucial for optimal communication, we are faced with a dilemma which can perplex even the sincerest and engaged of individuals.

You can have the perfect message, but it may fall on deaf ears when the listener is not prepared or open to listening.These listening planes were first introduced by the American composer Aaron Copland (1900-1990) as they pertain to music . . . 1. The Sensual Plane: You’re aware of the music, but not engaged enough to have an opinion or judge it.2. The Expressive Plane: You become more engaged by paying attention, finding meaning beyond the music, and noticing how it makes you feel.3. The Musical Plane: You listen to the music with complete presence, noticing the musical elements of melody, harmony, pitch, tempo, rhythm, and form.

When you become an actively engaged listener, you will develop the mindful awareness that active listening involves multiple layers and distinct levels.

To make matters even more complicated, research has shown that we remember only 25-50 percent of what we hear. This inclination not only compromises our connection with another person, but we can fail to retain vital information. All this evidence demonstrates that it is imperative that we intentionally pay closer attention and strive to become an in-depth listener.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be a natural communicator and know exactly what, when, why, and how to speak so that your message is conveyed and received as you intend?

Communicating negatively (gossiping, bragging, bullying, and criticizing) can be disastrous to your reputation, cause you to lose the respect of others, and leave a terrible impression. Why leave this essential expertise up to chance when it can make or break the success of your relations?

The Art of Communication shares insights to help you communicate with a higher awareness and focused intention and meet people on their level to increase clarity and understanding.

When you begin conversations with confidence and listen attentively, you will become more flexible and adaptable in most any situation.

Mindfulness means paying attention to what is happening at this very moment and being keenly aware of your surroundings and the people in it.

Whether your awareness is focused on your own emotions and perceptions or directed toward the preferences, needs, and feelings of others, being mindful (aware and attentive) will enable you to respond more appropriately.

This deliberate focus and sensitivity allow you to put yourself in another person’s shoes and walk around a while to better understand where they are coming from and what they are all about.

Mindfulness is a quiet strength and deeply rooted value which many other cultures understand and often practice better than we do. It can be puzzling to people from other countries as to why Americans are so task-driven and action-oriented.

Developing this ability instills a sixth sense for navigating human relationships with dignity, grace, and discretion, thus making an intentional and thoughtful first impression.

As Americans, we typically move full steam ahead without much regard to mindfulness or thoughtful reflection, often to one’s own detriment. Yet it is that same propensity for bold action which makes fulfilling the American Dream possible—where an immigrant can come to our country with nothing and achieve extraordinary things.