Quotes by Sarah Kane

And I want to play hide-and-seek and give you my clothes and tell you I like your shoes and sit on the steps while you take a bath and massage your neck and kiss your feet and hold your hand and go for a meal and not mind when you eat my food and meet you at Rudys and talk about the day and type up your letters and carry your boxes and laugh at your paranoia and give you tapes you dont listen to and watch great films and watch terrible films and complain about the radio and take pictures of you when youre sleeping and get up to fetch you coffee and bagels and Danish and go to Florent and drink coffee at midnight and have you steal my cigarettes and never be able to find a match and tell you about the tv programme I saw the night before and take you to the eye hospital and not laugh at your jokes and want you in the morning but let you sleep for a while and kiss your back and stroke your skin and tell you how much I love your hair your eyes your lips your neck your breasts your arse your but keep on asking because though you think I dont mean it I do always have from the first time I asked you and wander the city thinking its empty without you and want what you want and think Im losing myself but know Im safe with you and tell you the worst of me and try to give you the best of me because you dont deserve any less and answer your questions when Id rather not and tell you the truth when I really dont want to and try to be honest because I know you prefer it and think its all over but hang on in for just ten more minutes before you throw me out of your life and forget who I am and try to get closer to you because its beautiful learning to know you and well worth the effort and speak German to you badly and Hebrew to you worse and make love with you at three in the morning and somehow somehow somehow communicate some of the overwhelming undying overpowering unconditional all-encompassing heart-enriching mind-expanding on-going never-ending love I have for you.

Sometimes I turn around and catch the smell of you and I cannot go on I cannot fucking go on without expressing this terrible so fucking awful physical aching fucking longing I have for you. And I cannot believe that I can feel this for you and you feel nothing. Do you feel nothing?

Death is my lover and he wants to move in.

Body and soul can never be marriedI need to become who I already am and will bellow forever at this incongruity which has committed me to hell

Have you ever thought, thought your heart would break? Wished you could cut open your chest tear it out to stop the pain? Why don´t you riot like everyone else. I dont care, lifes too long. You can have any man you want. I want him...except him. Always suspected the world didnt smell of fresh paint and flowers. Smells of piss and human sweat If there could have been more moments like this.

...and tell you the worst of me and try to give you the best of me...

We made love, and then she threw up.

Theres not a drug on earth can make life meaningful

You’ll be all right. You’re strong. I know you’ll be okay because I like you and you can’t like someone who doesn’t like themself. The people I fear for are the ones who I don’t like because they hate themselves so much they won’t let anyone else like them either. But I do like you. I’ll miss you. And I know you’ll be okay.

Hes following me... He needs to have a secret but he can´t help telling the heat is going out of me. The heart is going out of me, and though she cannot remember she cannot forget. Clutching a fistful of sand. What ties me to you is guilt. I crossed two rivers and wept by one I am the beast at the end of the rope Happy and free.

the capture the rapture the rupture of a soula solo symphony

Watching me, judging me, smelling the crippling failure oozing from my skin, my desperation clawing and all-consuming panic drenching me as I gape in horror at the world and wonder why everyone is smiling and looking at me with secret knowledge of my aching shame.

Your disbelief cures nothing.

I am much fucking angrier than you think.

Embrace beautiful lies - the chronic insanity of the sane

HIPPOLYTUS: I cant sin against a God I dont believe in.

Ive never in my life had a problem giving another person what theywant. But no ones ever been able to do that for me. No one touches me,no one gets near me. But now youve touched me somewhere so fuckingdeep I cant believe and I cant be that for you. Because I cant find you.

drowning in a sea of logicthis monstrous state of palsy

I dread the loss of her Ive never touched love keeps me a slave in a cage of tears I gnaw my tongue with which to her I can never speak I miss a woman who was never born I kiss a woman across the years that say we shall never meet Everything passes Everything perishes Everything palls my thought walks away with a killing smile leaving discordant anxiety which roars in my soul No hope No hope No hope No hope No hope No hope No hope

- Please. Dont switch off my mind by attempting to straighten me. Listen and understand, and when you feel contempt dont express it, at least not verbally, at least not to me.(Silence.)- I dont feel contempt.- No?- No. Its not your fault.- Its not your fault. Thats all I ever hear, its not your fault, its an illness, its not your fault, I know its not my fault. Youve told me that so often Im beginning to think it is my fault.- Its not your fault.- I KNOW.- But you allow it.