“I am what I am. Take it or leave me alone.”
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“When I receive my first check, the first thing I did was take my daughters out for dinner, thats what I did,”
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How do you mourn endless numbers of people in endless numbers of places? Is there a form for it, a requisite time and place for mourning? Is there ever an end to it? Can there ever be an end to it?
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I am political in spite of myself. I dont want to do the things I know I have to do, dont want to expose myself to disapproval, to retribution, dont want to go to meetings and demonstrations, distribute leaflets, dont want to ask people for signatures, for money. I dont do these things as naturally as I breathe, the way I imagine real political people do, real communists, real socialists and feminists, real radicals, real troublemakers, real champions of the people. I do them because I know Ive got to, because I am convinced its the only way to make changes, to stop abuses. I do them almost as a last resort. I do them because Ive been putting off doing them, avoiding them for months, because finally the necessity has gripped me and overcome my reluctance, my desire for the warmth of my room, for my books, for my people, for the reassurance of my homely habits.
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