Quotes by Meghan Daum

Analyzing data from 79 men and women who wore inconspicuous devices that recorded some of their conversations over the course of four days, researchers from Washington University and the University of Arizona found a correlation between feelings of well-being and the amount of time spent talking every day. Moreover, the more substantive your conversations, the happier youre likely to be. In other words, heart-to-hearts trump small talk. (LA Times, A lof of happy talk, March 11, 2010, A21.)

For my mother’s entire life, her mother was less a mother than splintered bits of shrapnel she carried around in her body, sharp, rusty debris that threatened to puncture an organ if she turned a certain way.

Novelty has a way of intensifying memory. The less often you do something, the deeper the memory burrows in.

Theres more than one way to be a person. Actually, there are more than two or three ways. Youd think that was obvious, but I find that often it is not. The world is essentially a collection of teams. Life is a process of deciding which ones were going to join.

Life is mostly an exercise in being something other than what we used to be while remaining fundamentally — and sometimes maddeningly — who we are.

In the history of the world, a whole story has never been told.

For so long, maybe all my life, I thought only a house could make you whole. I thought I was nothing without an interesting address. I thought I was only as good as my color scheme, my drawer pulls, my floors....its the knowledge that a house can be as fragile as life itself. Youd think it would be stronger, since it can stand in one spot for centuries while generations of humans run through its rooms, grow up, move out, and eventually die. But a house is an inherently limited entity. It cant do everything, or even most things. It cannot give you a personality. It cannot bring you love. It cannot cure loneliness. It can provide comfort, safety, a sense of pride--that much I know.

I wonder if the real measure of home is the degree to which you can leave it alone. Maybe appreciating a house means knowing when to stop decorating. Maybe youve never really lived there until youve thrown its broken pieces in the garbage. Maybe learning how to be out in the big world isnt the epic journey everyone thinks it is. Maybe thats actually the easy part. The hard part is whats right in front of you. The hard part is learning how to hold the title to your very existence, to own not only property, but also your life. The hard part is learning not just how to be but mastering the nearly impossible art of how to be at home.

For so long, maybe all my life, I thought only a house could make you whole. I thought I was nothing without an interesting address. I thought I was only as good as my color scheme, my drawer pulls, my floors....its the knowledge that a house can be as fragile as life itself. Youd think it would be stronger, since it can stand in one spot for centuries while generations of humans run through tis rooms, grow up, move out, and eventually die. But a house is an inherently limited entity. It cant do everything, or even most things. I t cannot give you a personality. It cannot bring you love. It cannot cure loneliness. It can provide comfort, safety, a sense of pride--that much I know.

My goal in life is to be content. By that I dont mean fine or basically satisfied. I dont mean settling. I mean, for last of better terms, feeling like Im in the right life.

... I somehow got the idea that oak floors were located exclusively in New York City. This came chiefly from watching Woody Allen movies. I wanted to live someplace that looked like Mia Farrows apartment in Hannah and Her Sisters (little did I know that it was Mia Farrows apartment). To me, this kind of space did not connote wealth. These were places where paint was peeling and the rugs were frayed, places where smart people sat around drinking gin and tonics, having interesting conversations, and living, according to my logic, in an authentic way.

At some point in my early forties I realized that my primary goal in just about any verbal exchange is to lighten the mood.

People who choose not to have kids do so because they respect the job of parenting so much that they know not to take it on if they know its not something that theyre up for, and I dont know what to be a bigger tribute to parenting than that.

For a kid, self-esteem can be as close at hand as a sports victory or a sense of belonging in a peer group. Its a much more complicated and elusive proposition for adults, subject to the responsibilities and vicissitudes of grown-up life.

I always tell writers that its good to have an area of expertise. Its a really practical answer, I know, but know about science or about sports or about medicine, so you can work as a science writer or a sports writer. Dont just know about yourself.

We use our gadgets for distraction and entertainment. We use them to avoid work while giving the impression that were actually working hard.

The search for happiness has long been a dominant feature of American life. Its a byproduct of prosperity, not to mention the most famous line in the Declaration of Independence.

Air travelers, of course, are famous for their hubris. They carry on too many bags and use the restroom when the seat-belt sign is on.

In the world of opinion writing, theres something called the to be sure paragraph. A sort of rhetorical antibiotic, it seeks to defend against critics by injecting a tiny bit of counter-argument before moving on with the main point.

I have a distinct memory, dating back to 1989 or so, of sitting around with my college dorm mates talking about a new term that was popping up everywhere: political correctness.