Quotes by Jim Butcher

So. You get handed a holy sword by an archangel, told to go fight the forces of evil, and you somehow remain an atheist. Is that what youre saying?

Caring about someone isnt complicated. It isnt easy. But it isnt complicated, either. Kinda like lifting the engine block out of a car.

I still cant believe, Michael said, sotto voce, that you came to the Vampires Masquerade Ball dressed as a vampire.

Regardless of what I think about Islam or Wicca or any other religion, the fact is that its a group of people. Every faith has its ceremonies. And since its made up of people, every faith also has its assholes.

Ack! I said.Fearless master of the witty dialogue, thats me.

Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon--perfect.

You know how confusing the whole good-evil concept is for me.

Dont mess with a wizard when hes wizarding!

Likest thou jelly within thy doughnut?

Id made the vampire cry. Great. I felt like a real superhero. Harry Dresden, breaker of monsters hearts.

She frowned at me. You need some rest. You look like hell. And youre obviously tired enough to have gotten the giggles.Wizards dont giggle, I said, hardly able to speak. This is cackling.

I’ve had a tense couple of days. And I’ve got to tell you, burning someone’s face off sounds like a great way to relax.

I dont know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point.

Hells holy stars and freaking stones shit bells.

I let out a battle cry. Sure, a lot of people might have mistaken it for a sudden yelp of unmanly fear, but trust me. It was a battle cry.

Harry, Bob drawled, his eye lights flickering smugly, what you know about women, I could juggle.

It came charging toward me, several hundred pounds of angry-looking monster, and I did the only thing any reasonable wizard could have done.I turned around and ran like hell.

How long have you been a Wiccan?A what?A pagan. A witch.Im not a witch, I said, glancing out the door. Im a wizard.Sanya frowned. What is the difference?Wizard has a ZHe looked at me blankly.No one appreciates me. I muttered.

You rush a miracle worker, you get lousy miracles!

Murphy hung up and I said, to the still-open line, Hey, if youve got someone watching my place, could you call the cops if anyone tries to steal my Star Wars poster? Its an original.Then I vindictively hung up on the FBI. It made my inner child happy.