I can do pain. That’s the easy part of life. It’s everything else, happiness, laughter, love, that’s fucking complicated.
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Life is full of luck, like getting dealt a good hand, or simply by being in the right place at the right time. Some people get luck handed to them, a second chance, a save. It can happen heroically, or by a simple coincidence , but there are those who don’t get luck on a shiny platter, who end up in the wrong place at the wrong time, who don’t get saved.
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I realize that even through the hard times I’m sure we’ll face, I’ll never be able to walk away from her. -Micha
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He gazes at the people in the truck. Are you driving back with them? Smiling, I nod. Yes. With a bunch of dudes? Yes. Is that safe? My smile expands into a face consuming grin. I am safer in that truck than I am anywhere else.
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I shrug and shuffle my toe across the carpet in front of me, feeling silly. So? Its a compliment being like you. All the humor evaporates from his face and his honey-brown eyes. Within seconds he has me in his arms and he hugs me like Im the most important thing in the world to him. Dont ever change, Callie Lawrence, he whispers in my hair. Promise me you wont.
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But no matter what happens, I spoke up, made a voice for myself, freed from the haunting memories that have owned me for the last six years. I found my courage.
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To me, he is art, poetry for the eyes and heart. He is the most terrifyingly beautiful guy I have ever seen. And his scars have to tell a story...
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I just let the pain take over, allowing it to numb the pain of being left behind.
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Finally I find it, the book, but as I’m pulling it out of the stack I hear a noise coming from my toy room. It sounds like scratching or scraping maybe and my mind instantly goes to the possibility that maybe it’s a monster or a dragon or something else with claws. My hand shakes a little as I stand up and turn back toward the room. When I step into it, I feel the wind hit my cheeks. I shine the light around and notice one of the windows is open. I don’t understand why. I didn’t open it and I don’t think it was open when I came down here. What if it was a monster? I sweep the flashlight around the room at all my toys as I start back toward the corner. Then the light lands on something tall… I hear voices. Ones that don’t sound like they belong to a monster, but just people. But that’s what they end up being. Terrible, horrible monsters.
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Seriously, its like watching mild porn, watching you two eye fuck each other every two seconds.
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Im not scared of death, just tired. So fucking tired of being alive yet never fully breathing.
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I dont believe that. I dont believe that there are bad things about you. Only things that you think are bad.
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There are no accusations with writing, no judgment, no shame, only freedom.
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I walk out the door with a heavy feeling in my heart as another secret falls on top of it.
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Why do I always have so many fucking questions in my head?
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Its whats buried deep inside that frightens me because its broken, like a shattered mirror.
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At least tell me you won? And that the scratches and dings were totally worth it. Of course. Theyre always worth it, he says with a hidden meaning that only the two of us could ever understand.
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It isnt as important to feel great about all the things we do. But how we feel toward the end when we look back at everything weve done.
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Asher taps his fingers on his lips and I catch Amy licking her own as she eyes his mouth. What exactly are Rocky Mountain Oysters? he asks her.I restrain a laugh as Amys face twists in confusion.Well...I think theyre kind of meat. Im not sure what kind, but I like them. She presses the end of the pen against her chin.I shake my head at Asher. You dont want those. Trust me.
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Life has been full of evil, and if you dont start asking the right questions, the evil is going to be the end of you.
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