Quotes by Jeffrey Steingarten

“admits he prefers Haagen-Dazs to Ben & Jerrys. Even so, he salutes Carbones efforts to be different. There is something good and enlivening and even ennobling about food that makes you laugh, that makes you curious, makes you wonder.”

“[Among the cognoscenti, though, it is not just about elaborate new flavors.] I always consider the main test of ice cream to be the simple ice creams, especially vanilla, ... One should have fun when one eats, but it should also be seriously good.”

“The chief problem with modern life is not work in itself,”

“Yes, that pretty much sums it up. On this we can all agree.”

“The ingredients today dont impress us, but back then they were much more expensive and difficult to find. The Caesar, when it was first introduced, was considered exotic.”

But the goal of the arts, culinary or otherwise, is not to increase our comfort. That is the goal of an easy chair.

As long as I can remember, male candy eaters have been ill-used, misunderstood, and denigrated, in films and on television, as weak, self-indulgent, soft, effeminate, undisciplined, and venal. Most of us have been driven underground. We eat our candy alone and on the sly. We never experience the intimacy of sharing candy with others—unless we have chosen our mates wisely.

Whenever I travel to the South, the first thing I do is visit the best barbecue place between the airport and my hotel. An hour or two later I visit the best barbecue place between my hotel and dinner.

As a leftover sixties liberal, I believe that the long arm and beady eyes of the government have no place in our bedrooms, our kitchens, or the backseats of our parked cars. But I also feel that the immediate appointment of a Special Pastry Prosecutor would do much more good than harm. We know the free market has totally failed when 89 percent of all the tart pastry, chocolate-chip cookies, and tuiles in America are far less delicious than they would be if bakers simply followed a few readily available recipes. What we need is a system of graduated fines and perhaps short jail sentences to discourage the production of totally depressing baked goods. Maybe a period of unpleasant and tedious community service could be substituted for jail time.

Whenever I have nothing better to do, I roast a chicken.