Quotes by Helen Fisher

“Romantic love is deeply embedded in the architecture and chemistry of the human brain, ... Why We Love.”

“Words were a womans tools.”

“What our grandmothers told us about playing hard to get is true. The whole point of the game is to impress and capture. Its not about honesty. Many men and women, when theyre playing the courtship game, deceive so they can win. Novelty, excitement and danger drive up dopamine in the brain. And both sexes brag.”

“Romantic love is one of the most powerful of all human experiences. It is definitely more powerful than the sex drive.”

“It is very much like a drug high. When youre madly in love, you think this person is more special than anyone else on Earth. You focus all your attention on them. You have personality changes. Youre willing to take great risks to win the persons affection. And you have a tolerance level -- you see the person a couple of times a week at first, and thats OK for a while, and then youve got to see them every night.”

“The double-income family was the standard. We are really moving back to the past.”

“You can have it all, but it isnt easy.”

“A lot of these people still have hope. I wanted them crazy [in love]. These machines are expensive.”

“Its very hard to gauge. Those are signs of intention. But they are not signs that this person is actually good in bed and is compatible with you.”

“The brain system for romantic love is associated with intense energy, focused energy, obsessive things - a host of characteristics that you can feel not just toward a mating sweetheart, ... theres every reason to think that girls can fall in love with other girls without feeling sexual towards them, without the intention to marry them.”

Men with high baseline levels of testosterone marry less frequently, have more adulterous affairs, commit more spousal abuse, and divorce more often.

If two very different people pool their DNA, theyll create more genetic variety, and their young will come to the job of parenting with a wider array of skills.

Both sexes like the exercise and challenge of sports, but for men its also a basic display behavior for impressing and winning a mate.

Your sweetheart calls you by anothers name. His eyes linger too long on your best friend. He talks with excitement about a girl at work. And the fire catches. Jealousy - that sickening combination of possessiveness, suspicion, rage, and humiliation - can overtake your mind and threaten your very core as you contemplate your rival.

Men have a psychological need to show off their courage and strength. When he sees you talking to another guy, that instinct kicks in and he jumps to protect you and prove hes worthy of your love.

Today, most women are surrounded by ingenious gadgets. They dont grow the peas or raise the chicken that they serve for dinner; instead they hunt and gather in the grocery store. They go through catalogs or department stores to buy clothes instead of shearing sheep, carding wool, and weaving cloth for skirts and coats and blankets.

A lot of people head into courtship looking for fireworks. Dont pass up a chance by dumping someone after a first date because you dont feel the fireworks. The fireworks can happen at any time and be maintained.

Theres a lot of talk about the positive aspects of love. We as a society downplay the danger, the anxiety, and the disappointment. We romanticize romance.

A hundred years ago, if you had a child out of marriage, youd be a social disgrace. Today women feel comfortable enough economically and culturally to bring up a child without a recognized commitment from a man.

In America, we are demanding everything from our marriage.