Quotes by Donald Morgan

“If atheism is a religion, then bald is a hair color”

“The certainty with which a religious belief is held is usually in direct proportion to its absurdity”

“Thank God that the Bible cannot possibly be the word of God”

“Moral: A peerless maxim enumerated by God in his Holy Bible, such as that of Deuteronomy 23:1, if your testicles are crushed or your male member missing, you must never enter a sanctuary of the Lord”

“If God existed as an all-powerful being, He would not need the money that faithful believers donate to their churches”

“The effectiveness of any one of three prayers, each given twice, is expressed mathematically as: ((3x2)-6)/((6+1)-7)”

“It operates basically off the vibrations of the throat, with an ear piece. And it also works really good with a gas mask,”