And I thought about how many people have loved those songs. And how many people got through a lot of bad times because of those songs. And how many people enjoyed good times with those songs. And how much those songs really mean. I think it would be great to have written one of those songs. I bet if I wrote one of them, I would be very proud. I hope the people who wrote those songs are happy. I hope they feel its enough. I really do because theyve made me happy. And Im only one person.
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Asleep by the SmithsVapour Trail by RideScarborough Fair by Simon & GarfunkelA Whiter Shade of Pale by Procol HarumDear Prudence by the BeatlesGypsy by Suzanne VegaNights in White Satin by the Moody BluesDaydream by Smashing PumpkinsDusk by Genesis (before Phil Collins was even in the band!)MLK by U2Blackbird by the BeatlesLandslide by Fleetwood MacAsleep by the Smiths (again!)-Charlies mixtape
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Everyone loves each other, but no one really likes each other
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The family watched Its a Wonderful Life, which is a very beautiful movie and all I could think was why didnt they make a movie about uncle Billy?...Because he was a drunk and fat and lost all that money in the first place. I wanted an angel to come down and show us how uncle Billys life had meaning
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The two families really dont like each other, except for all us younger cousins because we dont know any better.
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So, I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe well never know them. But even if we dont have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. And we can try and feel okay about them.
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I just need to know that someone out there listens and understands and doesnt try to sleep with people even if they could have. I need to know that these people exist.
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Its sweet and everything, but its like youre not even there sometimes. Its great that you can listen and be a shoulder to someone, but what about when someone doesnt need a shoulder? What if they need the arms or something like that? You cant just sit there and put everybodys lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You just cant. You have to do things. Like what? I asked. My mouth was dry. I dont know. Like take their hands when the slow song comes up for a change. Or be the one who asks someone for a date. Or tell people what you need. Or what you want.
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It was the look on her face when she said it. And how much she meant it. It suddenly made everything seem like it really was. I felt terrible. Just terrible.
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I feel great! I really mean it. I have to remember this for the next time I’m having a terrible week. Have you ever done that? You feel really bad, and then it goes away, and you don’t know why. I try to remind myself when I feel great like this that there will be another terrible week coming someday, so I should store up as many great details as I can, so during the next terrible week, I can remember those details and believe that I’ll feel great again. It doesn’t work a lot, but I think it’s very important to try.
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You see things You keep quiet about them. You understand.
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I dont want to be just another thing mary elizabeth is in charge of
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And things were back to normal except we were just friends.
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Things change and friends leave and life doesnt stop for anybody
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And I think they knew. Not anything specific really. They just knew. And I think thats all you can ever ask from a friend.
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I dont remember where we were walking to or where we were walking from. I dont even remember the season. I just remember walking between them and feeling for the first time that I belonged somewhere.
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On that piece of white paper, Sam wrote, Write about me sometime. And I typed back to her, standing right there in her bedroom. I just typed. I will.And I felt good that those were the first two words that I ever typed on my new old typewriter that Sam gave me. We just sat there quiet for a moment, and she smiled. And I moved to the typewriter again, and I wrote something. I love you too.
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I know we didnt accomplish anything, but it felt great to sit there and talk about our place in things.
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I don´t want to be somebody´s crush, if somebody likes me, i want them to like the real me, not what they think I am.
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She also keeps talking about the Billie Holiday record she bought for me. And she says she wants to expose me to all these great things. And to tell you the truth, I dont really want to be exposed to all these great things if it means that Ill have to listen to Mary Elizabeth talk about all the great things she exposed me to all the time. It almost feels like of the three things involved: Mary Elizabeth, me, and the great things, only the first one matters to Mary Elizabeth. I dont understand that. I would give someone a record so they could love the record, not so they would always know that I gave it to them.
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