We are in the middle of what looks increasingly like the zombie apocalypse. Moaning people dont need help. Moaning people are intending to eat us.
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There was one thing no one considered, however: Australia was populated by Australians. While the rest of us were trying to adapt to a world that suddenly seemed bent on eradicating the human race, the Australians had been dealing with a hostile environment for centuries. They looked upon our zombie apocalypse, and they were not impressed.
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And to those who would choose the safety of inaction over the danger of taking a stand, I have this to say:You bloody cowards. May you have the world that you deserve.
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If you want to go foraging into the wilds of Canada without proper gear, you deserve what you get, even if that happens to include being attacked by an undead moose.
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Our story opens where countless stories have ended in the last twenty-seven years: with an idiot—in this case, Rebecca Atherton, head of the After the End Times Irwins, winner of the Golden Steve-o Award for valor in the face of the undead—deciding it would be a good idea to go out and poke a zombie with a stick to see what happens.
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My story ended where so many stories have ended since the Rising: with a man—in this case, my adoptive brother and best friend, Shaun—holding a gun to the base of my skull as the virus in my blood betrayed me, transforming me from a thinking human being into something better suited to a horror movie.
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May posterity show mercy when it look back upon the work we do today. We did what we could with what we had.
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If anything, global response to the Rising only confirmed something that many Australians had quietly believed for quite some time: If forced to live in Australia for a year, most of the world’s population would simply curl up in a fetal ball and die of terror.
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You know what? Fuck it. Just fuck it. The Rising didnt manage to wipe out the human race, it just made us turn into even bigger assholes than we were before. Hear that, mad science? You failed. You were supposed to kill us all, and instead you turned us into monsters.
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“Alive or dead, the truth wont rest. Rise up while you can.”
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“Given a choice between life and death, choose life. Given a choice between right and wrong, choose whats right. And given a choice between a terrible truth and a beautiful lie, choose the truth every time.”
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“If we didnt fear the truths we didnt hear, wed lose the need to fear the ones we did.”
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“George, she says its the truth that matters. We live and die for the chance to maybe tell a little bit of the truth, maybe shame the Devil just a little bit before we go.”
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“It is what it is. Isnt that how these things always go? They are what they are. We just get to cope.”
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“Behold the power of the truth. When people see its shadow on the wall, they dont want to take the time to look away.”
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“She told the truth as she saw it, and she died for it. I came along for the ride, and I lived. It wasnt worth it. But it was the truth, and it was what had to happen.”
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“Nothing is impossible to kill. Its just that sometimes after you kill something you have to keep shooting it until it stops moving”
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“Think about that for a moment. They died for you. Now take a good look at the life youre living and tell me: Did they do the right thing?”
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