Quotes by Jonathan Swift

Dignity high station or great riches are in some sort necessary to old men in order to keep the younger at a distance who are otherwise too apt to insult them upon the score of their age.

Zsa Zsa Gabor when asked which of the Gabor women was the oldest said Shell never admit it but I believe it is Mama. When men grow virtuous in their old age they only make a sacrifice to God of the devils leavings.

No wise man ever wished to be younger.

She looks as if butter wouldnt melt in her mouth.

That the universe was formed by a fortuitous concourse of atoms I will no more believe than that the accidental jumbling of the alphabet would fall into a most ingenious treatise of philosophy.

Theres none so blind as they that wont see.

I wont quarrel with my bread and butter.

The first springs of great events like those of great rivers are often mean and little.

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a pitchfork.

We are so fond of each other because our ailments are the same.

Complaint is the largest tribute Heaven receives.

An excuse is a lie guarded.

A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong which is but saying ... that he is wiser today than yesterday.

There is nothing in this world constant but inconstancy.

They say fingers were made before forks and hands before knives.

111 company is like a dog who dirts those most whom he loves best.

When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.

What some invent the rest enlarge.

I heard the little bird say so.

Lord! I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.