Quotes by Gretchen Rubin

Experts say that denying bad feelings intensifies them, acknowledging bad feelings allows good feelings to return.

By mindfully deciding how to act in line with my values instead of mindlessly applying my rules, I was better able to make the decisions that supported my happiness.

This is one of the many paradoxes of happiness: we seek to control our lives, but the unfamiliar and the unexpected are important sources of happiness.

I think adversity magnifies behavior. Tend to be a control freak? Youll become more controlling. Eat for comfort? Youll eat more. And on the positive, if you tend to focus on solutions and celebrate small successes, thats what youll do in adversity.

I always had the uncomfortable feeling that if I wasnt sitting in front of a computer typing, I was wasting my time--but I pushed myself to take a wider view of what was productive. Time spend with my family and friends was never wasted.

Whats fun for other people may not be fun for you- and vice versa.

When possible, the brain makes a behavior into a habit, which saves effort and therefore gives us more capacity to deal with complex, novel, or urgent matters.

Upholders may struggle in situations where expectations arent clear or the rules arent established. They may feel compelled to meet expectations, even ones that seem pointless. They may feel uneasy when they know theyre breaking the rules, even unnecessary rules, unless they work out a powerful justification to do so.

Audiences = expectations. If he thinks youre not watching, he wont need to rebel against your expectations.

I had everything I could possibly want -- yet I was failing to appreciate it. Bogged down in petty complaints and passing crises, weary of struggling with my own nature, I too often failed to comprehend the splendor of what I had.

Potato-chip news is news thats repetitive, requires little effort to absorb, and is consumable in massive quantities: true crime, natural disasters, political punditry, celebrity gossip, sports gossip, or endless photographs of beautiful houses, food, or clothes.

Nature is impersonal, awe-inspiring, elegant, eternal. Its geometrically perfect. Its tiny and gigantic. You can travel far to be in a beautiful natural setting, or you can observe it in your backyard - or, in my case, in the trees lining New York City sidewalks, or in the clouds above skyscrapers.

Growing up in Kansas City, I was always neat, the teachers pet, know-it-all type.

They say that people teach what they need to learn. By adopting the role of happiness teacher, if only for myself, I was trying to find the method to conquer my particular faults and limitations.

In the scope of a happy life, a messy desk or an overstuffed coat closet is a trivial thing, yet I find - and I hear from other people that they agree - that getting rid of clutter gives a disproportionate boost to happiness.

If I can do something in less than one minute, I dont let myself procrastinate. I hang up my coat, put newspapers in the recycling, scan and toss a letter. Ever since I wrote about this rule in The Happiness Project, Ive been amazed by how many people have told me that it has made a huge difference in their lives.

Each week, I post a video about some Pigeon of Discontent raised by a reader. Because, as much as we try to find the Bluebird of Happiness, were also plagued by those small but pesky Pigeons of Discontent.

Happiness is a critical factor for work, and work is a critical factor for happiness. In one of those life-isnt-fair results, it turns out that the happy outperform the less happy. Happy people work more hours each week - and they work more in their free time, too.

We need to have intimate, enduring bonds; we need to be able to confide; we need to feel that we belong; we need to be able to get support, and just as important for happiness, to give support. We need many kinds of relationships; for one thing, we need friends.

As goofy as it sounds, I try to sing in the morning. Its hard both to sing and to maintain a grouchy mood, and it sets a happy tone for everyone - particularly in my case, because Im tone deaf, and my audience finds my singing a source of great hilarity.