Quotes by Elbert Hubbard

Nothing is of any value except that which you create for yourself, and no joy is joy save as it is the joy of self-expression.) 2. Mind speaking through its highest instrument, Man. EYE: 1. An organ of the human body which sees the universe as it is not, and transmits the same to the brain. 2. The soul's feelers and pickers. EYEBALL: 1. A small, miraculous globe that has the power to fabulize the external universe. 2. The spectacles of the brain; the peephole of consciousness. EPITAPH: 1. Postponed compliments. 2. Postmortem bull-con. 3. Qualifying for the Ananias Club. EUROPEAN: An inhabitant of New York City. EXECUTIVE: A man who can make quick decisions and is sometimes right. FARMER: 1. A man who raises early feed for potato-bugs. 2. One who supplies raw stock for vaudeville jokes. 3. A man who makes his money in the country and blows it in when he comes to town. (Farms were first devised as an excuse for the Agricultural Department at Washington.) FAILURE: 1. The man who can tell others what to do and how to do it, but never does it himself. 2. A man who has blundered, but is not able to cash in the experience. FASHION: A barricade behind which men hide their nothingness. FAME: To have your name paged by the "buttons" of a fashionable hotel. FAITH: 1. The effort to believe that which your commonsense tells you is not true. 2. The first requisite in success. FAKE: An event that occurs every four years in the United States; hence, by extension, anything popular. FAMILY LINE: The clothes-line. FAST TRAIN: One that has no diner. FEAR: 1. A club used by priests, presidents, kings and policemen to keep the people from recovering stolen goods. 2. The thought of admitted inferiority. 3. The rock on which we split. FEATHERS: Secondary sex advertisements made of fiber and horsetails, and used on ladies' lids as eye-gougers and such. FEUD: A fool idea fanned into flame by a fool friend. FEMINIST MOVEMENT: 1. A hot desire to step on the male tumble-bug. 2. An uneasy, eccentric, patho-psychio gyration, caused by disappointment or thwarted ambition. 3. A loose cam or a cosmic monkeywrench in the convolutions.

I am not sure what the unpardonable sin is, but I believe it is a disposition to evade the payment of small bills ❦ Labor is the only prayer that is ever answered ❦ ❦ If men could only know each other, they would never either idolize or hate. I would rather be able to appreciate things I can not have than to have things I am not able to appreciate ❦ Vivisection is blood-lust, screened behind the sacred name of Science ❦ If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble ❦ ❦ Friends and credit pursue the man who does not need them. Hell is a separation, and Heaven is only a going home to our friends. Success is the realization of the estimate which you place upon yourself. We are all children in the kindergarten of God ❦ ❦ Missionaries are sincere, self-deceived persons suffering from meddler’s itch. Give us this day our daily work. A criminal: One who does by illegal means what all the rest of us do legally. How beautiful that most of our troubles never happen! We are not punished for our sins, but by them ❦ ❦ One great, strong, unselfish soul in every community would actually redeem the world ❦ ❦ Do not take life too seriously—you will never get out of it alive. You are what you think, and not what you think you are. Who is my brother? I’ll tell you—he is the one who recognizes the good in me. Do your work with a whole heart and you will succeed—there is so little competition! When a woman works, she gets a woman’s wage; but when she sins, she gets a man’s pay—and then some ❦ Life without absorbing occupation is hell—joy consists in forgetting life ❦ Respectability is the dickey on the bosom of civilization. A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman as bad as she dares. If you want work well done, select a busy man—the other kind has no time. Mind your own business, and thus give other folks an opportunity to mind theirs ❦ ❦ The outcome of the battle is of no importance—but, how did you fight? ❦ Do not keep your kindness in water-tight compartments. If it runs over a bit ’twill do no harm. Genius is fine, but if it comes to a show-down, gumption is better. In a world where death is, there is no time for hate.

The personal bravery of the man was proven more than once in his life, and on the approach of death he was undismayed. When he passed away, April Nineteenth, Eighteen Hundred Twenty-four, Stanhope wrote, "England has lost her brightest genius--Greece her best friend." His body was returned to England, denied burial in Westminster, and now rests in the old church at Hucknall, near Newstead. JOSEPH ADDISON Thus am I doubly armed: my death and life, My bane and antidote, are both before me. This in a moment brings me to an end; But this informs me I shall never die. The soul, secured in her existence, smiles At the drawn dagger, and defies its point. The stars shall fade away, the sun himself Grow dim with age, and Nature sink in years; But thou shalt flourish in immortal youth, Unhurt amid the war of elements, The wreck of matter, and the crash of worlds! --_Cato's Soliloquy_ [Illustration: JOSEPH ADDISON] Men are not punished for their sins, but by them. Expression is necessary to life. The spirit grows through exercise of its faculties, just as a muscle grows strong through use. Life is expression and repression is stagnation--death. Yet there is right expression and wrong expression. If a man allows his life to run riot, and only the animal side of his nature is allowed to express itself, he is repressing his highest and best, and therefore those qualities, not used, atrophy and die. Sensuality, gluttony and the life of license repress the life of the spirit, and the soul never blossoms; and this is what it is to lose one's soul. All adown the centuries thinking men have noted these truths, and again and again we find individuals forsaking, in horror, the life of the senses and devoting themselves to the life of the spirit. The question of expression through the spirit or through the senses--through the soul or the body--has been the pivotal point of all philosophies and the inspiration of all religions. Asceticism in our day finds an interesting manifestation in the Trappists, who live on a mountain, nearly inaccessible, and deprive themselves of almost every vestige of bodily comfort; going without food for days, wearing uncomfortable garments, suffering severe cold.

And as the years go by, more and more we see the line of Ingersoll's life stretching itself straight. Every change to him meant progress. Success is a question of temperament--it is all a matter of the red corpuscle. Ingersoll was a success; happy, exuberant, joying in life, reveling in existence, he marched to the front in every fray. As a boy he was so full of life that he very often did the wrong thing. And I have no doubt that wherever he went he helped hold good the precedent that preachers' boys are not especially angelic. For instance, we have it on good authority that Bob, aged fourteen, once climbed into the belfry of a church and removed the clapper, so that the sexton thought the bell was bewitched. At another time he placed a washtub over the top of a chimney where a prayer-meeting was in progress, and the smoke broke up the meeting and gave the good people a foretaste of the place they believed in. In these stories, told to prove his depravity, Bob was always climbing somewhere--belfries, steeples, house-tops, trees, verandas, barn-roofs, bridges. But I have noticed that youngsters given to the climbing habit usually do something when they grow up. For these climbing pranks Robert and Ebon were duly reproved with a stout strap that hung behind the kitchen-door. Whether the parsonage was in New York, Pennsylvania, Ohio or Illinois--and it dodged all over these States--the strap always traveled, too. It never got lost. It need not be said that the Reverend John Ingersoll was cruel or abusive--not at all: he just believed with Solomon that to spare the rod was to spoil the child. He loved his children, and if a boy could be saved by so simple a means as "strap-oil," he was not the man to shirk his duty. He was neither better nor worse than the average preacher of his day. No doubt, too, the poverty and constant misunderstandings with congregations led to much irritability--it is hard to be amiable on half-rations. When a stepmother finally appeared upon the scene, there was more trouble for the children. She was a worthy woman and meant to be kind, but her heart wasn't big enough to love boys who carried live mice in their pockets and turned turtles loose in the pantry.

He did mighty well to carry in stock the things that people needed. But here was a revolutionary method--a new deal. Henry Rogers' father said it was initiative gone mad, and would last only a few weeks. Henry Rogers' mother said otherwise, and Henry agreed with her. He had clerked in his father's grocery, and so knew something of the business. Moreover, he knew the people--he knew every family in Fairhaven by name, and almost every one for six miles around as well. He started in at three dollars a week, taking orders and driving the delivery-wagon. In six months his pay was five dollars a week and a commission. In a year he was making twenty dollars a week. He was only eighteen--slim, tall, bronzed and strong. He could carry a hundred pounds on his shoulder. The people along the route liked him: he was cheerful and accommodating. Not only did he deliver the things, but he put them away in cellar, barn, closet, garret or cupboard. He did not only what he was paid to do, but more. He anticipated Ali Baba, who said, "Folks who never do any more than they get paid for, never get paid for anything more than they do." It was the year Eighteen Hundred Fifty-nine, and Henry Rogers was making money. He owned his route, and the manager of the stores was talking about making him assistant superintendent. Had he stuck to his job he might have become a partner in the great firm of Cobb, Bates and Yerxa, and put Bates to the bad. It would have then been Cobb, Rogers and Yerxa--and later, H. H. Rogers, Dealer in Staple and Fancy Groceries. But something happened about this time that shook New Bedford to its center, and gave Fairhaven a thrill. Whale-oil was whale-oil then, and whale-oil and New Bedford were synonymous. Now, a man out in Pennsylvania had bored down into the ground and struck a reservoir. A sort of spouting sperm-whale! But with this important difference: whales spout sea-water, while this gusher spouted whale-oil, or something just as good. * * * * * The year Eighteen Hundred Fifty-nine is an unforgetable date--a date that ushers in the Great American Renaissance, in which we now live.

The government will support you to the utmost of its ability, which is neither more nor less than it has done and will do for all commanders. I much fear that the spirit you have aided to infuse into the army, of criticising their commander and withholding confidence from him, will now turn upon you. I shall assist you as far as I can to put it down. Neither you nor Napoleon, if he were alive again, could get any good out of an army while such a spirit prevails in it. And now beware of rashness, but with sleepless vigilance go forward and give us victories. Yours very truly, A. LINCOLN. One point in this letter is especially worth our consideration, for it suggests a condition that springs up like deadly nightshade from a poisonous soil. I refer to the habit of carping, sneering, grumbling and criticising those who are above us. The man who is anybody and who does anything is certainly going to be criticised, vilified and misunderstood. This is a part of the penalty for greatness, and every great man understands it; and understands, too, that it is no proof of greatness. The final proof of greatness lies in being able to endure contumely without resentment. Lincoln did not resent criticism; he knew that every life was its own excuse for being, but look how he calls Hooker's attention to the fact that the dissension Hooker has sown is going to return and plague him! "Neither you, nor Napoleon, if he were alive, could get any good out of an army while such a spirit prevails in it." Hooker's fault falls on Hooker--others suffer, but Hooker suffers most of all. Not long ago I met a Yale student home on a vacation. I am sure he did not represent the true Yale spirit, for he was full of criticism and bitterness toward the institution. President Hadley came in for his share, and I was given items, facts, data, with times and places, for a "peach of a roast." Very soon I saw the trouble was not with Yale, the trouble was with the young man. He had mentally dwelt on some trivial slights until he had gotten so out of harmony with the place that he had lost the power to derive any benefit from it. Yale college is not a perfect institution--a fact, I suppose, that President Hadley and most Yale men are quite willing to admit; but Yale does supply young men certain advantages, and it depends upon the students whether they will avail themselves of these advantages or not.

INFIDEL: One who defames his Creator and impeaches his own reason by believing in Orthodox Christianity. INFIDELITY: To remain faithful to one's self, and to be unfaithful to some one else's faith. In religion, to think; in the marriage institution, to fall in love; in business, to do the thing to the other fellow that the other fellow intends to do to you, and do it first. ISSUE: In physiology, something that comes up and out; in politics, something that goes down and in. INGRATITUDE: 1. A girl who is too busy to acknowledge receipt of a Christmas present. 2. The portion of the man who has done well; and a fight with the fox you have warmed into life is imminent. INFUSORIA: The entire human race with the exception of Homer, Richard Wagner, Dante, Victor Hugo, Balzac, Rodin, Raphael, Æschylus, Shakespeare, Schopenhauer and Edward Bok, in whose tremendous skulls we live and move and have our being, like a whirlwind of germs in the vats of the Absolute. INGRATE: Any person who has got something for nothing, and wants more on the same terms. INITIATIVE: Doing the right thing without being told. IRONY: The cactus-plant that sprouts over the tomb of our dead illusions. JUDICIOUS: 1. A state of mind wherein things are weighed in an imponderable scale; a conjunction of two negatives in a void. 2. To be wanting in foolishness, character or brains. 3. An exquisite and delicate perception of the difference between two things that are exactly alike, or the total unlikeness between two things that are absolutely different. 4. An umbrella to be carried on clear days as well as on rainy ones, thus protecting the possessor from everything. 5. To lie flat on your puss while the juggernaut of Opinion goes over you; to stand perfectly still between two streetcars going in opposite directions. 6. To see what's coming and avoid it by taking all sides. JOURNALIST: A newspaperman out of a job. JURY: 1. The stupidity of one brain multiplied by twelve. 2. A collection of sedentary owls. 3. The humble apology of Civilization to Savagery. _E. g._, "Whatever exists may be touched, but a jury is an exception to this universal law--it must be reached.

I am not sure what the unpardonable sin is, but I believe it is a disposition to evade the payment of small bills ❦ Labor is the only prayer that is ever answered ❦ ❦ If men could only know each other, they would never either idolize or hate. I would rather be able to appreciate things I can not have than to have things I am not able to appreciate ❦ Vivisection is blood-lust, screened behind the sacred name of Science ❦ If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble ❦ ❦ Friends and credit pursue the man who does not need them. Hell is a separation, and Heaven is only a going home to our friends. Success is the realization of the estimate which you place upon yourself. We are all children in the kindergarten of God ❦ ❦ Missionaries are sincere, self-deceived persons suffering from meddler’s itch. Give us this day our daily work. A criminal: One who does by illegal means what all the rest of us do legally. How beautiful that most of our troubles never happen! We are not punished for our sins, but by them ❦ ❦ One great, strong, unselfish soul in every community would actually redeem the world ❦ ❦ Do not take life too seriously—you will never get out of it alive. You are what you think, and not what you think you are. Who is my brother? I’ll tell you—he is the one who recognizes the good in me. Do your work with a whole heart and you will succeed—there is so little competition! When a woman works, she gets a woman’s wage; but when she sins, she gets a man’s pay—and then some ❦ Life without absorbing occupation is hell—joy consists in forgetting life ❦ Respectability is the dickey on the bosom of civilization. A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman as bad as she dares. If you want work well done, select a busy man—the other kind has no time. Mind your own business, and thus give other folks an opportunity to mind theirs ❦ ❦ The outcome of the battle is of no importance—but, how did you fight? ❦ Do not keep your kindness in water-tight compartments. If it runs over a bit ’twill do no harm. Genius is fine, but if it comes to a show-down, gumption is better. In a world where death is, there is no time for hate.

Savagely yet tenderly has he received the priceless treasure and hidden it away where none could recall ❦ He has heard the dying groans of untold thousands, and drowned their cries for help with his own ceaseless roar; but still his ear has not failed to catch the whispers of confession that have come from souls about to appear before their Maker. And yet how beautiful and kind is he in his apparent relentless cruelty, for he keeps only the transient part, and gently separates the immortal and wafts the spirit back to God who gave it. ¶ And what does the sea do with all these secrets, mysteries and treasures? Go shrive thyself, and with soul all in tune to the harmonies of the Universe listen to the waves and they shall tell thee the secrets of life! [Illustration] [Illustration] Epigrams How much finer it is to go out into the woods and lift up your voice in song, and be a child again, than to fight inclination and waste good God-given energy endeavoring to be proper! I am not sure what the unpardonable sin is, but I believe it is a disposition to evade the payment of small bills ❦ Labor is the only prayer that is ever answered ❦ ❦ If men could only know each other, they would never either idolize or hate. I would rather be able to appreciate things I can not have than to have things I am not able to appreciate ❦ Vivisection is blood-lust, screened behind the sacred name of Science ❦ If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble ❦ ❦ Friends and credit pursue the man who does not need them. Hell is a separation, and Heaven is only a going home to our friends. Success is the realization of the estimate which you place upon yourself. We are all children in the kindergarten of God ❦ ❦ Missionaries are sincere, self-deceived persons suffering from meddler’s itch. Give us this day our daily work. A criminal: One who does by illegal means what all the rest of us do legally. How beautiful that most of our troubles never happen! We are not punished for our sins, but by them ❦ ❦ One great, strong, unselfish soul in every community would actually redeem the world ❦ ❦ Do not take life too seriously—you will never get out of it alive. You are what you think, and not what you think you are. Who is my brother? I’ll tell you—he is the one who recognizes the good in me.