Quotes by Boris Johnson

“My friends, as I have discovered myself, there are no disasters, only opportunities. And, indeed, opportunities for fresh disasters.”

“My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.”

“The Tory Party - the funkiest, most jiving Party on Earth!”

“Tremendous, little short of superb. On cracking form.”

“Ken doesnt think hes got anything to say sorry for and if thats really his feeling, then I think that he should stick to his guns.”

“But heres old Ken - hes been crass, hes been insensitive and thuggish and brutal in his language - but I dont think actually if you read what he said, although it was extraordinary and rude, I dont think he was actually anti-Semitic.”

“Pyramid of piffle [no, not his views on Liverpool but a report Petronella Wyatt was his mistress]”

“The dreadful truth is that when people come to see their MP they have run out of better ideas.”

“I love tennis with a passion. I challenged Boris Becker to a match once and he said he was up for it but he never called back. I bet I could make him run around.”

“I have as much chance of becoming Prime Minister as of being decapitated by a frisbee or of finding Elvis.”

You know, sometimes I dont understand whats wrong with us. This is just about the most creative and imaginative country on earth—and yet sometimes we just dont seem to have the gumption to exploit our intellectual property. We split the atom, and now we have to get French or Korean scientists to help us build nuclear power stations. We perfected the finest cars on earth—and now Rolls-Royce is in the hands of the Germans. Whatever we invent, from the jet engine to the internet, we find that someone else carts it off and makes a killing from it elsewhere.

There must be room in our world for eccentricity, even if it offends the prudes, and room for the vague other-worldliness that often goes with genius.

My point is that this Potter business has legs. It will run and run, and we must be utterly mad, as a country, to leave it to the Americans to make money from a great British invention. I appeal to the children of this country and to their Potter-fiend parents to write to Warner Bros and Universal, and perhaps, even, to the great J K herself. Bring Harry home to Britain—and if you want a site with less rainfall than Rome, with excellent public transport, and strong connections to Harry Potter, I have just the place.

I want you to know that I have nothing against Orlando, though you are, of course, far more likely to get shot or robbed there than in London.

In the words of Mr Thierry Coup of Warner Bros: We are taking the most iconic and powerful moments of the stories and putting them in an immersive environment. It is taking the theme park experience to a new level. And of course I wish Thierry and his colleagues every possible luck, and I am sure it will be wonderful. But I cannot conceal my feelings; and the more I think of those millions of beaming kids waving their wands and scampering the Styrofoam turrets of Hogwartse_STmk, and the more I think of those millions of poor put-upon parents who must now pay to fly to Orlando and pay to buy wizard hats and wizard cloaks and wizard burgers washed down with wizard meade_STmk, the more I grind my teeth in jealous irritation.Because the fact is that Harry Potter is not American. He is British. Where is Diagon Alley, where they buy wands and stuff? It is in London, and if you want to get into the Ministry of Magic you disappear down a London telephone box. The train for Hogwarts goes from Kings Cross, not Grand Central Station, and what is Harry Potter all about? It is about the ritual and intrigue and dorm-feast excitement of a British boarding school of a kind that you just dont find in America. Hogwarts is a place where children occasionally get cross with each other—not mad—and where the situation is usually saved by a good old British sense of HUMOUR. WITH A U. RIGHT? NOT HUMOR. GOTTIT?

The Remain campaign... Ive never seen a more miserable offering. All they are saying is stay in and well do our best to make sure that Britains Parliamentary independence isnt eroded faster than we can possibly imagine.

If we vote to Leave and take back control, all sorts of opportunities open up. Including doing new free trade deals around the world, restoring Britains seat on all sorts of international bodies, restoring health to our democracy and belief to our democracy.

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.

It would be a sad day if we British stopped being cynical, but you sometimes wonder whether we overdo it.

The idea that the EU is somehow the guarantor of peace on the continent - that is in itself rash, in my view, and risks undermining the vital role of Nato.