“I don't need somebody behind a desk to tell me what a marketing survey says is funny. I got 3 million miles and 70,000 tickets sold, telling me that I know how to make people laugh.”

“It's a very appropriate show to be doing around Halloween because it's very dark and mysterious. There are some great chorus scenes and some dark stuff and funny stuff as well. It's a really perfect balanced show in many regards.”

“It's nothing really. It's the unique presentation that makes me look good in the action scenes. Why did I dare do them? That's a funny question! Why do I act? Why do I breathe!”

“They trip, fall, lay down flat on their face and have no idea of what is going on. Sometimes all you can do is laugh, but when the person is a danger to other people or themselves, then it isn't funny and you have to help them out.”

Books. It's always easier to tell people that a character is funny rather than attempt to hit the punchline of a joke that character would've said. But if we all simply told, books would cease to exist. And so would empathy. And feeling.

Jail's are a spooky place," remarked Bill, trying to match the pace of detective Adam."Oh that is nothing in front of the ultimate fear" replied detective Adam."Ultimate fear?""Funny thing that, the ultimate fear is also the ultimate relief.""Which is?""Death

“I never burn anybody because I know exactly what I'm doing. I've never had any tragedies. I had something funny happen, though. One customer saved the wax and made a necklace out of it.”

“The play is funny. And people love baseball. But there's a moral lesson. 'Rounding Third' is particularly suitable for that part of the audience made up of young parents. We are a generation of helicopter parents, constantly hovering over our kids, fussing with them.”

What a funny girl, I thought, and then I realized something. To the three-year-old ye, and maybe even to the thirty year old eye, weeds and grass look very similar. Same color, same feeling, same texture.

“It actually got to where he wasn't saying 0-0 anymore, we'd wait a few seconds and then one of us would say it. I don't even think he noticed, he was so focused on the game. It was kind of funny.”